So the long break is over. I’ve spent more than a week here in my hometown; sleeping in my childhood bedroom and eating my mom’s home-cooked dishes every single day. Having nothing else to do other than watching TV and surfing the net, I decided to watch old TV shows online. ”Friends” doesn’t count because we could still watch the reruns every now and then on StarWorld. But I’m talking about my favourite TV shows way back then when I was still in school and university like: “Ally McBeal” and “Gilmore Girls”.
I remember having to fight for the remote control with my parents each time “Ally McBeal” was on. Sometimes I would call my friends asking them about the week’s episode whenever I have to give up the remote control to my parents. Same goes with “Gilmore Girls” but I was already in uni when the series started. I watched it from this TV room at my hostel on Sunday nights with like 20 other boys who were there just for “ Alexis Bledel”.
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I used to quote whatever Ally said in my journal. In fact, I missed writing in my journal just as much as I missed watching Ally, Rory and Lorelai. I was so young and I felt like writing was a good way to deal with all the teenage/adolescence crap that I had to deal with at that time. I used to write every single night before I go to bed. That was up until I finally leave the house to attend university and by that time writing in my journal felt like such a chore with my dorm-mates snooping around and always wanted to know what the hell I was writing about. I tried but by the following year, I just gave up...
I gave up on “Ally McBeal” and “Gilmore Girls” too because it was just impossible to find the time to watch TV with assignments and course works to be submitted every single week. And at that time, box-set of TV series was almost unheard of. I didn’t even own a computer at that time.
At least 10 years have passed and so many things have happened in between. I’m almost thirty (which really doesn’t make sense) and I’ve made countless mistakes along the way. I’ve fallen down and dust myself up again. I have seen how doors were being closed and opened so many times. How people simply come and go. But after watching these two of my favourite TV shows again today, it all seems very clear to me. Our past have prepared and shaped us into the people that we are today.
Watching “Ally McBeal” taught me about love and the realness of the world out there (minus the dancing baby). I learned about loneliness and how it happens to the best of us.” Gilmore Girls” reminded me of my family and how important it is to hang on to one another. And these two shows let me explore my talent for writing (if you can really call it that). Had it not been for the exposure to the different kind of emotions on these TV shows, I might not have understood any of them and felt the need to write about them in my journals.
Like when Billy died on “Ally McBeal”, that was a five-page entry in my journals with tears streaming down my face. And watching the final episode of Rory's going away party just now?
Song playing inside my head: Vonda Shepard's Searching My Soul